Have you ever felt lonely? Recently even?
For some, loneliness is an emotion they are all too familiar with. I’ve learned that having a loving family or strong support system doesn’t grant you immunity from loneliness. It’s a paradox that somehow we can simultaneously feel happiness, affection, love and loneliness.
Chances are, over the past few months, you too have felt lonely...at least once. But, even before COVID-19 emerged and forced us into an unprecedented time of physical isolation, loneliness was a pandemic in the United States. According to a large poll conducted in July 2019, 3 out of 5 adults in the US reported that they sometimes or always felt lonely. We can only imagine how those numbers have increased as a majority of the country has been sheltering at home.
Loneliness is a serious illness; it is as equally damaging to your health as smoking a pack of cigarettes per day. And it’s not just a disease of the elderly. 18-22 year olds were the loneliest generation in the above mentioned 2019 poll. Interestingly, increasing social media usage even resulted in increased loneliness.
God and Loneliness
Why are we lonely? Right now we could say this is just the result of grieving for normalcy. Maybe a stress response to the realities of our current situation? Sure, these are factors. But I am convinced that our hearts are primarily lonely because they are seeking the one true thing that can satisfy them—not dinner parties with friends, concerts, sporting events, work routine, or even gathering in a church building. What we are really seeking is fellowship with God himself. Stillness and disruption from routine have a way of revealing the loneliness we all have inside of us—that God-shaped hole, as C.S. Lewis would call it.
So, we must not run from our loneliness. We must thank God for it because, through those feelings, He is drawing us back to himself. We were designed by God for community and need to remain faithful to regularly connect with fellow Christians, but the only real and lasting antidote to loneliness is a personal relationship with Jesus.
God has never left us. If we have believed in and accepted the gospel of Jesus Christ, then we are forever united to Him. However, despite His nearness, our own hearts can become distant, distracted, and lured away by other idols. Even if you feel far from Him right now, He is still with you. Here. Right now and always, because Christ lives in you.
Why should Christ living in us give us hope even in the midst of feelings of loneliness?
Christ in us means:
We have constant fellowship with Him.
Fellowship with the One who gives peace, joy, and hope. We are invited to “pray continually”. I always loved the lines in the old hymn, “He lives, He lives! Christ Jesus lives today. He walks with me and talks with me along life’s narrow way...” Is Jesus your dearest friend? He really can be. There is no love more satisfying.
We have access to God’s awesome power.
We have the power to overcome our sin and the power to do good works as we are enabled by the Spirit. Through His strength, we can turn our loneliness into ministry. Ask God to open your eyes to people around you that need to be shown the love of Jesus.
We are constantly being renewed into His likeness.
As Christians, we can find solace in the fact that Jesus never wastes a hurt. He can (and will!) use your experience of loneliness to shape your character and increase your reliance upon Him. As we seek and trust Him, the Spirit convicts us of our sin, leading to repentance. The Spirit develops in us the fruits of love, joy, peace, patience, goodness, kindness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control.
From loneliness to Christ-likeness. That is beauty from ashes.
If you are currently in a season of loneliness, please reach out to a friend or minister at the church. They would love to talk to you. We really do need each other.
Meet the Author!
Taylor is the wife of Council Road's Groups Pastor, Micah White, and mother to Navy and Foster. She works as a PA in Oklahoma City, and is also passionate about serving and edifying the local Church. She most enjoys time with her family, but can also be found reading, teaching, making music, hand-lettering, and hosting gatherings. She loves a friendly debate and a good laugh.