Hello Friends!
If we have had a conversation in the past couple of months, we have probably discussed the Enneagram. If you have not heard of the Enneagram, it is a personality test that has become quite the fad recently. I think it goes into more depth than many other personality tests, asking you specific questions about your personality with results being a number from 1-9. Each number has its own qualifications and distinctions. If you’re interested in learning more about and/or taking the test, click HERE. For great descriptions of each personality type, click HERE.
Since Valentine's Day is coming up, below is a brief bulleted list of how each Enneagram number shows their love and how they want to receive love. Also, at the end of each number, I have left a link that takes you to a playlist made for each Enneagram number. I hope this is helpful in spreading love and care for others!
Ones:
Show their love for others:
Help you to come to the right solution
Give encouragement from truth, not flattery
Research like crazy in order to come to the truth
Want to receive love:
Genuine encouragement on their good qualities and works
Help them fight their inner critic with truth
Do not publicly call out their shortcomings, but in private and with gentleness
https://open.spotify.com/user/halcaida_21/playlist/0W6xWwomLA7WZApz2MXM4p?si=MSwDYNTYQ0KZb7NqxpQYtw
Twos:
Show their love for others:
Sacrifice their time to help with anything
Intently Listen
Are emotionally available
Want to receive love:
WORDS OF AFFIRMATION
Physical affection
Accept them for who they are and not how well they can serve you
https://open.spotify.com/user/halcaida_21/playlist/5VnOYiteKDwSBfLZS2lFtW?si=M9swHjRvQFeBO0x4pzG5Og
Threes:
Show their love for others:
Help you pursue your best self
On point when assembling a game plan in order to accomplish a task
Will help you in whatever way in order to gain approval
Want to receive love:
Accept them for who they are and not how well they can perform
Talk about deeper topics
Affirm their good qualities
https://open.spotify.com/user/halcaida_21/playlist/5M07cIcZaCdxCTYFHMTKpr?si=uyGBgaW3Tn6sQyvq74og5w
Fours:
Show their love for others:
Talk about deep topics because they care about your opinions and values
Emotionally judgement free and can handle the heaviest conversations
Will express the beauty they see in you and in the world
Want to receive love:
Let them feel the freedom to feel and express their emotions without judgement
Show you care for their passions
Emotional affection
https://open.spotify.com/user/halcaida_21/playlist/1P0LQdXjttebDcaYa3kjW8?si=1l_XBmcWQ96z6PaNeFoqlg
Fives:
Show their love for others:
Offer their knowledge in support
Can help you separate feelings from thoughts
Seek to understand a person and their perspective
Want to receive love:
Words of affirmation
Seek to understand their feelings, passions, and thoughts
Truly listen to them
Give them space to think and express their thoughts
https://open.spotify.com/user/halcaida_21/playlist/3afUiq8Pg9kP7z29SUo0ai?si=A7zJrHeoS5m-UyUveTj_SQ
Sixes:
Show their love for others:
LOYAL -- will go to bat for you every time if they trust you
Bring imagination and ideas to the table
Offer a safe place for people to be and talk
Want to receive love:
Words of affirmation
Remember little details
Let them know that you are committed
https://open.spotify.com/user/halcaida_21/playlist/4yXL2LdxZlh1E0uKOBUzGa?si=1y
Sevens:
Show their love for others:
Take you on all the adventures
Biggest supporter of your passions
Words of affirmation
Want to receive love:
Match their energy level
Be excited about their passions
Freedom to come down from their excitement and just be who they are without all their energy
https://open.spotify.com/user/halcaida_21/playlist/3JNu2j2yXKuugRaes0GQ4H?si=dgxttTx6RTaQmoDOdv8-Gg
Eights:
Show their love for others:
INTENSITY in all areas of life
Generous with their power
Protect the people they love
Wants to receive love:
Freedom to be independent
Let them feel that there is not a struggle for power in your relationship
Clear communication of expectations
https://open.spotify.com/user/halcaida_21/playlist/4lE0f5MTJSF7eTYuN5vEIn?si=HFRwba3WQea_W2DGK_PVvQ
Nines:
Show their love for others:
Seek happiness in order to keep the peace
Can see through you and see the authentic you
Deep conversations
Want to receive love:
Space to think and feel
Reassurance of who they are
Let them feel understood in their avoidance of confrontation, but also help them to deal with confrontation in a gentle and healthy manner
https://open.spotify.com/user/halcaida_21/playlist/0pdqXTOYA9kLNMX2S9FSlU?si=Wpy60bd4Tk-B2Ql9h82nvA
I hope this is helpful! I am not an expert in the Enneagram, but someone that finds it incredibly interesting. Shoutout to all the awesome people who filled out the survey I sent out for this article. All of your input is much appreciated! Also, we should know that the Enneagram should not shape our identity in any matter; God is the only one to mold you and I. Happy Valentine’s Day!
Meet the Author!
Hailee Alcaida is the 9th grade English teacher at Bethel Acres High School. Being an English teachers combines two of Hailee’s passions: literature and building relationships. Hailee and her students love to laugh at the current memes, dab, and learn about the world through reading and writing. Living with an enneagram 7 helps her to put a book down, get out of their house, and explore OKC with friends and all its fun that it has to offer. By the way, Hailee is an enneagram 4w3. Continue the conversation with Hailee – email halcaida2212@gmail.com.