“Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds,…”
James 1:2
I don’t know about you, but hearing that I should be counting it joy when I have struggles seems like an oxymoron. How in the world can those two things go together? I think I am just beginning to understand what we are being asked to do here.
When I moved to Oklahoma in the fall of 2021, I was overwhelmed. I was in a new house in a new city, looking for a new church and hoping for community. I fell deep into anxiety. I became mentally trapped in worst case scenarios that played on an incessant loop. I felt completely alone, even though we had family close by. I could not see how God would use this move.
My only friend in Oklahoma City was Natalie Ford. She was the picture of Jesus for me in this season. Her home was a safe place and I felt peace within her four walls. She reminded me time and again that this wouldn’t last forever and that Jesus had me. I needed her reminders. She had walked anxiety before. She knew the right scripture to point me to.
Fast forward to the spring of 2024 and I had a sweet friend reach out to me about her own anxiety. She was dealing with the same ramblings and lies that had played in my own head in that earlier season. Because I had walked this, I had scripture, words and specific prayers that I could offer. This was a moment of joy for me. I wasn’t rejoicing that my friend was struggling. I was rejoicing because I could see the good that God had worked out of my anxiety. I felt like this trial finally had a purpose.
One of the greatest trials I ever experienced was losing the ability to conceive children. I had just had my sweet son, Benjamin, and we were settling in as our little family of three when my body betrayed me. After two stays in the hospital post birth and losing over half of my blood supply, my doctor broke the news that she would have to perform a hysterectomy if I had another episode. My husband and I had always had the desire to adopt. We knew that was going to be in our life someway or another. We just didn’t know that God would make it so obvious.
When I had another episode 6 days later, I remember laying in our room awaiting the ambulance and I looked up at Sam and said, “so we will adopt our next baby.” I knew God was working in this trial. Without this pain, we would not have our sweet Anna Brooke. While the trial hurt, I had the privilege of seeing God work through it.
I don’t always get to see the good that God works through my trials. Sometimes they never make sense, but I can cling to the earlier mentioned scripture in James that goes on to say, “because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything” (James 1:3-4).
I know that I won’t always feel happy, but the deeper joy that comes when I see God in the midst of my pain is enough. I wasn’t called to be a Christ follower to have an easy life. I was called to follow Him and trust that He truly has my life in His hands. I remind myself of that daily to remain in joy.
My life verse is “Rejoice in the Lord always, I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near” (Philippians 4:4-5).
God is near. Therefore I can always have joy.
Meet the Author!
Bonnie Cannon serves as the Director of Children's Ministry at CRBC. After graduating from SWOSU she taught 2nd grade at Perry Public Schools. She moved to Houston and served in preschool ministry at Crossroads Baptist Church as a Preschool Childcare Coordinator. She and her family moved back to Oklahoma City in 2021 and found their church home at CRBC. She loves teaching kids about the Gospel and leading them to Jesus. She is married to Sam Cannon and they have two kiddos, Ben and Anna.