In my mind, I was hovering over my grave site, watching my three preschoolers and my grieving husband view my casket lowering into the ground. Fear and hopelessness overwhelmed me! But…that was 30 years ago. My death never actually happened. I can assure you though that my devastating diagnosis brought a voice of fear and death as strong in my head as was the gravesite image that came to my mind.
Every year I make myself a wall calendar. I have tried to use the calendar on my phone, I really have. It is not for me. As a visual/tactile learner, I need to see myself write things down or I will not keep them in my brain. So, every year in November, I begin gathering all the photos we have taken throughout the year and make myself a calendar. I make one for my mother-in-law, my grandfather-in-law, and, together, my sister and I make one that we give to my mother and my grandmother. These calendars basically serve as a journal of our lives. Appointments, parties, concerts, soccer games, etc. It’s all there.
Forgiveness is hard. Without the Holy Spirit’s help, for me it was impossible. I learned how hard it was after my son ended his life as a result of false accusations made against him. I felt justified in hating the person that had done this and wore my ‘Grieving Mom’ badge for a very long time. It got bigger and heavier every day, but I felt like it was my “right” to continue to wear it.
Throughout my life, many people with a passion for God have influenced me--my parents and grandparents especially. However, my first youth pastor also left an indelible mark on my life. My memory of him consists of a face always radiating joy and a life filled with a fiery, intense devotion for the Lord. Truly, his kind, jubilant spirit provoked a jealousy in me. I wanted what he had. His fervor created in me a desire to know and experience God in the same way. Thus, it was his testimony of a simple prayer that he prayed one night that inspired a simple prayer of my own--a prayer that I have prayed over and over and believe has made all the difference in my life.
I love the story I heard of Farmer Herman and the Flooding Barn. Herman had a barn that flooded terribly every time it rained. After many failed solutions, he decided the only way to save his barn was to physically move it. So his community showed up and 344 people literally lifted the barn up by metal supports and moved it up a hill so that his livestock would have dry shelter and food. What a beautiful picture of community - everyone banning together to do a small thing in order to perform something that alone seemed impossible.
Have you ever dreamed of what you could do with just a little financial start? My family is full of idea people, so I have grown up with people around me dreaming up new entrepreneur projects, thinking of how to plan an awesome family get together, and scheming about how to help others in need. Do you have those people around you?
I’m not sure I really knew what I was getting into when I signed up to help with Whiz Kids. I knew it was a tutoring program and that I would be working with a student each week. I’m not a teacher, so I was slightly concerned that I wouldn’t be qualified. I was assured that being a teacher was not a requirement.
When I was just starting on the pathway of doing children’s ministry at Council Road Baptist Church, I encountered that quote. As I remember, it was credited to a man who was a famous actor, singer, dancer and comedian. His name? Danny Kaye. Now I don’t know if he was a particularly wise man, but I do know that he realized a truth about children: they are a treasure of great value and it is imperative for the future that we protect, nurture, guide and love them.
